How You Can Learn To Overcome Failure

All the best-laid plans can go wrong. Nothing in life is ever a guarantee, and in some seasons, we can be overwhelmed by feelings of failure. We can be angry, disappointed and full of self-pity. It all depends on how we view failure. If we shift our perspective and view failure not as a negative experience, but a necessary part of the process, then we can change our life completely.

Maybe you won’t learn to love failure, but you can learn to value the experience.

“The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing.”
— Henry Ford

I have been painting and exhibiting for over 25 years. I have had some incredible shows, and I have experienced some amazing failures.

Here are 5 lessons that I have learnt from my adventures that have made me a better person. I hope it helps you to keep moving forward.

#1. Failure is inevitable

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” — Robert F. Kennedy

You just have to accept the fact; failure is a part of life. Especially for the creative folk. When we try something new, and it doesn’t work, this forces us to attempt something different. Failure is how we learn and improve our skills. The way we deal with the situation will help to develop who we are as a person.

Expect failure to arrive on your journey, and it will not overtake you when it does.

If we are not failing in our pursuits, then we are not really trying too hard to create something original.

Rise Up, acrylic on canvas, original painting

#2. The place where you start is not where you will finish.

“If you’re not prepared to be wrong, you’ll never come up with anything original”. — Ken Robinson

When I begin a new painting, I often don’t know what I am trying to achieve. I have a feeling for what I want to create, but I don’t work from sketches or preliminary drawings. So it is only a springboard. The painting will come together in the process.

The first layer of the painting is only the beginning and where the painting starts is not where it will end.

The first layer is fun, as I pile on a tonne of beautiful colours and push them around the canvas. It is about halfway through the second layer when the pain begins. The difficultly sets in, the design may not be working, and the composition is falling apart.

At this stage of the process, everything is a mess. When I first learnt to paint, this section would crush me. I would throw myself on the ground and cry. I would declare how useless I was and vow to give up. I found it very hard to feel the emotions of failure; it would reinforce the belief that I was no good. It would rip at my insecurities.

As I kept creating, I learnt to accept this part of the process. It would always happen about halfway through the painting. I just needed to push on. I had to ignore how the experience made me feel. I had to believe in myself and to determine to make the artwork successful.

The third layer of the painting will reveal if it is going to be a masterpiece or a mess. If it turns out to be a disaster, then I can always paint over it and start again. The place where you start is not where you will finish if you can push through the difficulties. 

Believe in yourself and keep moving forward.

My Soundscape exhibition of original paintings

#3. Determine what success looks like.

“Define success on your own terms, achieve it by your own rules, and build a life you’re proud to live.”
– Anne Sweeney

An exhibition is always a challenging project. After months, sometimes years of working in a studio, the painting collection is put on display. To be judged by the public. You have to determine for yourself what success looks like. Then you define your own failure.

This Soundscape Exhibition (photo) has been my absolute favourite throughout my whole painting career. It was held a few years ago, in a regional gallery. I put together a collection of beautiful abstract paintings. Each one was accompanied by music.

I had asked friends to record a piece of music to a specific painting. It was to be their musical interpretation of the art piece. The paintings were presented with headsets to experience the sound while viewing the art. There were 16 different pieces of music, created from the inspiration of each painting.

It was a deeply moving experience. The sound added an extra dimension to the visual art. Visitors would sit and listen to the music while viewing the painting. Their response was illuminating. They left comments saying the painting started to move while they were looking at it. The whole experience deeply impacted them on multiple levels.

To me, this was a grand success and a project I had worked on for a few years. The problem was when anybody asked me about the exhibition they only asked about sales. Did I make any money? How many paintings did I sell? The answer was no. I didn’t sell any of these paintings during this exhibition. As more people asked about the monetary amount, the more I realised that I had to decide my definition of success.

The exhibition had deeply impacted people, and I had married sound and visual art in such a way that it produced a physical response in the receptors of the brain. It was an amazing experience. I considered it a very successful exhibition, although it made no money. To other people, it would have appeared to be a failure.

Determine what success is because this will help to define what failure looks like.

#4. It’s all about your response

“Failures are finger posts on the road to achievement.”
— C.S. Lewis

Recently I wrote an article about my brother. I thought it was pretty good, so I sent it to a publisher on Medium, but they didn’t think it would work for them. Not to worry, I polished it up and sent it to another publisher, and again it was not received.

Instead of getting upset, taking it personally and having a rant, I looked at the article more closely. I had written an article about finding my father that had previously been published and curated. So I knew my writing was alright and this was an achievable goal. Was it the subject? Was it the formatting?

I changed the title and in doing so, changed the angle of the story. I shifted the emphasis and gave the reader something to take away. I learnt a lot from this process. Having failed with the first two submissions, this helped me to more accurately define what I wanted to write and how to present my article.

Did this feel good? No, it was annoying and a little upsetting. But the experience helped me to develop my writing skills. After I had reworked my story, and completely changed the second half, I sent it to a third publisher. It was received, and by the end of the day, my article had been curated in family topics.

Failure is not final. There is always something to learn.

It is all about your response. If you allow yourself to grow through your experience, then this situation will not represent failure. Rather it will be an opportunity to gain a different perspective.

#5 It’s not a failure if you don’t give up.

“Your hardest times often lead to the greatest moments of your life. Keep going. Tough situations build strong people in the end.”
― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

The next few months are going to be difficult for everyone. Starting the year again will be painful. Looking for new employment or even preparing a resume will add stress to your life and shred your self-worth.

Refuse to quit. Just don’t give up. Whatever you are trying to accomplish, keep after it. Do whatever you have to do to strengthen yourself and push through.

You can do this. Pick yourself up and keep going. The world needs you.

Froyle Davies
I’ve been a visual artist for over 25 years and now I tell my stories.
Let me inspire you with this beautiful free print, ‘Above the Stormy Waters.’

Cheers Froyle